Loved reading your thoughts on this and how you’ve connected the dots between our relationship with trends and the feelings that come up. “In many ways, it’s easy to feel judged for both participating in trends and not participating in trends.” To me, the judgement for participating in a trend always feels harsher than that of sitting one out. That’s why when I’m writing about a trend I’m loving, I sometimes feel compelled to preface it with “I know it may be overdone, but…” Seems so silly to feel the need to defend something I love to wear, trend or not.
You also brought up some good points on embodiment vs. emulation. I love shopping and clothes but am no way a stylist, so it helps to look to others for inspiration on how to put things together. I’ve definitely bought into trends that didn’t feel like me (parachute pants!) but I think going through that trial and error has helped me be more reflective of my choices. While I still look to others for ideas and recommendations, I feel like I’m now starting to get a better grasp of what trends would actually work for me and how to make them my own.
Yes! I couldn’t agree more to both. When I participating in trends I almost feel apologetic like “oh yes, sorry I’m wearing horseshoe denim like everyone else.” So silly! But, as you said, I have started to feel like myself within trends more and I feel so empowered. I credit taking a step back from social media to that because I’m surrounding myself with ideas (via Substack in a lot of cases) rather than product influence.
You articulate this so well, Kelly! I feel a constant pull of desiring belonging (and also often being quite inspired by ladies who have great takes on trends) and the push of not want to “succumb” to trends. I can’t stop myself from feeling both, so I have to get better at picking what makes sense for me/my style/budget/life/etc. and that’s a little bit science and a little bit art (because some of this is highly emotional!) love reading this one!!!
Oh you are the best, Christina. Thank you for the encouragement. I am so glad to know I’m not alone navigating these feelings; I both want to be an individual and also participate!
That TikTok 😂 Love a striped sweater, though ❤️ I went shopping in person this week, and it was so refreshing. I am totally swearing off online shopping. Love your thoughts, and you don’t sound judgmental at all!
Agree 100% on in person shopping. I’m also actually not sure you can teach somebody how to ‘embody not emulate’. I think that makes the difference between someone who is genuinely stylish and someone who just follows trends. Loved your newsletter as always. Thanks Kelly!
YES re: the difference between embodying and emulating! There's a difference for sure, and you're giving me a lot to think about.
So interesting that when that IG 2024 Trend Talk mentioned Gen Z's, they talked about them "filling their closets" with things that are more in line with their core aesthetics. The language they use is fascinating, and I'm wondering whether this current vibe of everyone trying to find their own personal taste might be just another excuse to keep buying more and more stuff... I'm intrigued!
As someone who bought a red jumper recently, I too am intrigued as to why people are in a flap about looking the “same”...when I look at old photos of my mum in the 1960s and 70s, I could make the same argument that everyone kind of “looked the same” back then too. The same with Kyle Chayka’s “airspace” theory--did homes, cafes and restaurants really look super different from one another in the past? I think personal taste/style is so much more than the material things we consume and surround ourselves in, and for most of us, it’s telegraphed in ways only our close friends and loved ones know about, rather than something that looks instantly coherently on social media. Personally I think my algorithm is pretty well trained and I’ve no quibble with most of what is being served to me, the real trouble is stopping myself from shopping needlessly! Or being on social media at all...
Also, it’s interesting to observe trends but I think the idea that most of us are simply buying things because an algorithm told us to is a stretch. Maybe Sambas have been everywhere because sneakers are everywhere, and sneakers are everywhere because more people can wear sneakers to work now, and inevitably some of those people like Sambas.
You make an interesting point. One could argue that the world is simply flatter (in the way the internet makes more accessible) and that is why we see cafes looking the same, etc. Seeing everyone wear a red jumper is because I CAN see so many people (thanks to social media).
I, too, have no problem with my algorithm except when it prevents my creativity. If anything, it inspires me to emulate something I wouldn’t have thought of before.
Agree! I discovered a lot of what I love because of the internet. Also, I forgot to say thanks for writing this piece, it really got my brain going over my morning coffee! :)
I'm glad you brought this up, Lin -- this is super interesting! I feel that there's something quite different about our current era vs how people dressed "the same" in the 1960s or the 1970s. Trends always existed but how quickly they become global is another question. The fast fashion mentality, hyper consumerism, and yes, the algorithm, have a lot more power over people than we might even realize.
Just a random example: from the standpoint of being a vintage shop owner I see in person that a huge portion of my customer base is more preoccupied with blending in than ever. If I had an endless supply of beige non-descript cashmere sweaters, I'd do much better financially than I do. Hardly anyone buys color or print anymore. People want to buy vintage that looks like something you can buy at Frankie Shop, and this wasn't the case before. You'd have your 1950s fans, you had your psychedelic hippies, your romantics, you had your 1980s punk kids, the grunge enthusiasts... now everyone wants beige cashmeres. I think maybe the pandemic broke us, somehow..?
Preoccupied with blending in!! I think you nailed something here as it relates to the quote about “fearing bad taste.” Most shoppers (right now) care about looking safe than expressing a color that might interest them but make them stand out!
Agree, the way we consume is totally different now--so many avenues for shopping, and the speed at which trend awareness spreads is startling! But maybe I don't feel it as much because in my personal life, I see trends online more than I see them in real life, especially when I'm back home in Singapore...I had to explain the Frankie Shop look to a friend by referencing a bunch of celebs she didn't know, haha, and when I finished, she said, 'no one I know dresses like that' (and this is a very cool friend who does pay attention to style). I don't doubt the algorithms are very influential and we need to challenge that, but the internet is also pretty good at catering to individualised tastes, so maybe there is hope yet...(fingers crossed). I'm glad that shops like yours exist, they remind me that tastes aren't dictates solely by big brands, and the right customer is waiting to find you!
I felt the same way about the interview: style looked ‘the same’ in the previous decades, because that is what trends are. I think when we look back in 20 years time, we will much more easily be able to see the trends now. We are too enmeshed at the moment - just need a bit of perspective.
Loved reading your thoughts on this and how you’ve connected the dots between our relationship with trends and the feelings that come up. “In many ways, it’s easy to feel judged for both participating in trends and not participating in trends.” To me, the judgement for participating in a trend always feels harsher than that of sitting one out. That’s why when I’m writing about a trend I’m loving, I sometimes feel compelled to preface it with “I know it may be overdone, but…” Seems so silly to feel the need to defend something I love to wear, trend or not.
You also brought up some good points on embodiment vs. emulation. I love shopping and clothes but am no way a stylist, so it helps to look to others for inspiration on how to put things together. I’ve definitely bought into trends that didn’t feel like me (parachute pants!) but I think going through that trial and error has helped me be more reflective of my choices. While I still look to others for ideas and recommendations, I feel like I’m now starting to get a better grasp of what trends would actually work for me and how to make them my own.
Yes! I couldn’t agree more to both. When I participating in trends I almost feel apologetic like “oh yes, sorry I’m wearing horseshoe denim like everyone else.” So silly! But, as you said, I have started to feel like myself within trends more and I feel so empowered. I credit taking a step back from social media to that because I’m surrounding myself with ideas (via Substack in a lot of cases) rather than product influence.
You articulate this so well, Kelly! I feel a constant pull of desiring belonging (and also often being quite inspired by ladies who have great takes on trends) and the push of not want to “succumb” to trends. I can’t stop myself from feeling both, so I have to get better at picking what makes sense for me/my style/budget/life/etc. and that’s a little bit science and a little bit art (because some of this is highly emotional!) love reading this one!!!
Oh you are the best, Christina. Thank you for the encouragement. I am so glad to know I’m not alone navigating these feelings; I both want to be an individual and also participate!
That TikTok 😂 Love a striped sweater, though ❤️ I went shopping in person this week, and it was so refreshing. I am totally swearing off online shopping. Love your thoughts, and you don’t sound judgmental at all!
Ahh! Thank you for this encouragement!
That TikTok made me laugh and laugh. And also go, oh God I hope that never happens to me 🙃
Agree 100% on in person shopping. I’m also actually not sure you can teach somebody how to ‘embody not emulate’. I think that makes the difference between someone who is genuinely stylish and someone who just follows trends. Loved your newsletter as always. Thanks Kelly!
I wonder the same thing, Greta! My instinct says that those with innate personal style among us are better at embodying BUT I sure hope I can learn 😂
great examples with Leandra and Mrs. Solomon on Style - love both!
Yes!! Love those stylish ladies!
So spot on. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and putting a finger on how I’ve been feeling lately. It truly is a minefield!
I’m so glad I’m not alone! We are in it together 🤝
YES re: the difference between embodying and emulating! There's a difference for sure, and you're giving me a lot to think about.
So interesting that when that IG 2024 Trend Talk mentioned Gen Z's, they talked about them "filling their closets" with things that are more in line with their core aesthetics. The language they use is fascinating, and I'm wondering whether this current vibe of everyone trying to find their own personal taste might be just another excuse to keep buying more and more stuff... I'm intrigued!
Yes! Agreed! I think we all tend to hide our consumption behind good intention (I know I do!) but I hope there is a more genuine shift here somewhere!
As someone who bought a red jumper recently, I too am intrigued as to why people are in a flap about looking the “same”...when I look at old photos of my mum in the 1960s and 70s, I could make the same argument that everyone kind of “looked the same” back then too. The same with Kyle Chayka’s “airspace” theory--did homes, cafes and restaurants really look super different from one another in the past? I think personal taste/style is so much more than the material things we consume and surround ourselves in, and for most of us, it’s telegraphed in ways only our close friends and loved ones know about, rather than something that looks instantly coherently on social media. Personally I think my algorithm is pretty well trained and I’ve no quibble with most of what is being served to me, the real trouble is stopping myself from shopping needlessly! Or being on social media at all...
Also, it’s interesting to observe trends but I think the idea that most of us are simply buying things because an algorithm told us to is a stretch. Maybe Sambas have been everywhere because sneakers are everywhere, and sneakers are everywhere because more people can wear sneakers to work now, and inevitably some of those people like Sambas.
You make an interesting point. One could argue that the world is simply flatter (in the way the internet makes more accessible) and that is why we see cafes looking the same, etc. Seeing everyone wear a red jumper is because I CAN see so many people (thanks to social media).
I, too, have no problem with my algorithm except when it prevents my creativity. If anything, it inspires me to emulate something I wouldn’t have thought of before.
Agree! I discovered a lot of what I love because of the internet. Also, I forgot to say thanks for writing this piece, it really got my brain going over my morning coffee! :)
Thank YOU!! I spent a lot of time thinking and writing this so that means the most 🤍
I'm glad you brought this up, Lin -- this is super interesting! I feel that there's something quite different about our current era vs how people dressed "the same" in the 1960s or the 1970s. Trends always existed but how quickly they become global is another question. The fast fashion mentality, hyper consumerism, and yes, the algorithm, have a lot more power over people than we might even realize.
Just a random example: from the standpoint of being a vintage shop owner I see in person that a huge portion of my customer base is more preoccupied with blending in than ever. If I had an endless supply of beige non-descript cashmere sweaters, I'd do much better financially than I do. Hardly anyone buys color or print anymore. People want to buy vintage that looks like something you can buy at Frankie Shop, and this wasn't the case before. You'd have your 1950s fans, you had your psychedelic hippies, your romantics, you had your 1980s punk kids, the grunge enthusiasts... now everyone wants beige cashmeres. I think maybe the pandemic broke us, somehow..?
Preoccupied with blending in!! I think you nailed something here as it relates to the quote about “fearing bad taste.” Most shoppers (right now) care about looking safe than expressing a color that might interest them but make them stand out!
Yes, I think so. Maybe we all crave to be safe in our tumultuous world, and that's reflected on our clothing choices as well?
Agree, the way we consume is totally different now--so many avenues for shopping, and the speed at which trend awareness spreads is startling! But maybe I don't feel it as much because in my personal life, I see trends online more than I see them in real life, especially when I'm back home in Singapore...I had to explain the Frankie Shop look to a friend by referencing a bunch of celebs she didn't know, haha, and when I finished, she said, 'no one I know dresses like that' (and this is a very cool friend who does pay attention to style). I don't doubt the algorithms are very influential and we need to challenge that, but the internet is also pretty good at catering to individualised tastes, so maybe there is hope yet...(fingers crossed). I'm glad that shops like yours exist, they remind me that tastes aren't dictates solely by big brands, and the right customer is waiting to find you!
I felt the same way about the interview: style looked ‘the same’ in the previous decades, because that is what trends are. I think when we look back in 20 years time, we will much more easily be able to see the trends now. We are too enmeshed at the moment - just need a bit of perspective.
Let’s hope “the filling their closets” means filling them with smart and sustainable buys while finding their own personal taste.
We can always hope! 🤞